The Jewel in the Pig’s Snout🐷💎

The true beauty of every Christian woman lies in her not just on her. This is one quote I pondered over from reading Proverbs 11:22- A beautiful woman who lacks discretion is like gold ring in a pig’s snout. There is an inherent cleanliness defect in the pig, the gold ring in its snout doesn’t prevent it from going back to the mud after being cleaned. The transformation of the outward appearance of the pig has no effect on its inherent nature to bathe in the mud.

This scripture teaches loads of wisdom and I want us to look at two of them:

Development of character Is better than enhancing outward beauty. From the scripture we get to know that a woman without discretion can be likened to a gold ring found on the pig. Let’s understand this very well, the writer is saying that a beautiful woman who lacks discretion, irrespective of how beautiful she looks will eventually “go back to the mud”. Such a woman will continue to quarrel, use abusive languages and put up all forms of negative behaviour.

Don’t be concerned about the outward beauty of fancy hairstyles, expensive jewelry, or beautiful clothes. You should clothe yourselves instead with the beauty that comes from within, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious to God.
1 Peter 3:3‭-‬4 NLT

It is very important that as women we work on our attitude- towards work, family, strangers, neighbours and most importantly attitude towards God. Seek to develop character; a godly woman should not be slanderous, abusive, irritating, quarrelsome and contemptuous. Discretion should be the trademark of every lady; the ability to act appropriately in all circumstances to avoid attracting unnecessary attention to oneself.

The beauty in your snout should be amplified by your character. Making up on the outside is great but have you tried making up on the inside? Develop character, know how to speak to people, be tolerant and be hospitable- these are traits which do not only catches a man’s attention but they draw God’s attention to you as well.

•Beauty doesn’t look good on rotten attitudes: There is something about bad attitude which masks physical beauty. I believe you have encountered beautiful ladies whose utterances just turned you off. At that point in time, it’s like a blindfold has been taken off your eyes which makes you see the true beauty in the person and you realise that there was no beauty after all.

Let your conversation be gracious and attractive so that you will have the right response for everyone.
Colossians 4:6 NLT

There is a popular saying in Akan which goes like this, “beauty can get you into marriage but character will drive you out”. That’s like a direct translation though 😂. However, beauty loses it value if it doesn’t meet up with a godly and good attitude. Seek counsel on godly living, get closer to God and be at peace with everyone.

A gentle and a quiet spirit is beautiful and pleasing to God. I don’t think you just aim at getting a good man because a godly attitude coupled with beauty will get you a good man and The Good God, Himself.

Who can find a virtuous and capable wife? She is more precious than rubies.
Proverbs 31:10 NLT

Help Him Fall Out of Love With You.

I have come across so many ladies who claim to be in relationships and yet flirts with every other gentleman that crosses her path.

There is another group, they won’t date a particular gentleman. Yet, they won’t allow him to go. They keep these gentlemen around them for the company they provide, for the strolls and probably for the gifts she receives yet this guy will get a big “NO” after proposal.

Another group of ladies exists, they will treat you very well. They have all the time in the world for a man, they will cook for the guy, sponsor dates with the guy, introduce the guy to family and friends and Guess what? She introduces him as “just a friend”. This guy decides to get a girlfriend and hell breaks loose

This is the group I seek to address in this post. Why do keep him if you don’t see your future with him? Well, I’m not talking about the next five years; there are some guys you just can’t even imagine the next three days with him as your husband or even a boyfriend/fiancé/beloved. So why do you keep pursuing him after making it clear that you only want him as a friend?

I find it to be unfair to guys who find themselves in such situations because I think it can be very frustrating knowing that you can’t make any progress in any intimate relationship because of “a friend” who keeps blaming you for not calling her three times a day to check up on her. This lady friend will call you in the night, and woe unto you! Man if it turns out to be a waiting call.

Ladies, I think it’s about time we learned to make decisions and stuck to it. Most guys after knowing your intentions of keeping them as friends decide to give some distance to avoid any emotional intimacy which they will find quite hectic to break away from. In doing so some decide to reduce the number of times they call you in a day, they reduce the number of visits and others keep the conversations quite shorter than usual. In this case, don’t push further my sister, don’t complain. Understand a poor brother and please help him fall out of love with you since you have no future with him.

Some ladies complain and whine about all of these things the guy does but please understand that communication is a very vital in establishing relationships, so a breakdown in communication can reduce all of these unwanted emotional attachments. He is not doing that just to save himself but to save your friendship as well. Stop complaining, stop nagging and stop telling him to always come and take you out when he is working on breaking emotional attachments with you. Give him space as well so that he can put his emotions in place.

Yes, you are scared of losing your friendship but that shouldn’t also lead you to say yes when you actually don’t want him. Give him space, don’t be too quick to pick up all of his calls, don’t be too quick to reply his texts, sometimes reject some offers to take you out. Help him to fall out of love with you my lady. Subtly and gently help him deal with the emotional attachment, it will help you build a healthy friendship with him as both of you focus on more intimate relationships elsewhere.

“How much land does a man need?”

I read a short story titled “How much land does a man need?” during literature class. The story is about a man- Pahom who aims at getting as much area of land he can acquire so that he won’t fear even the devil. In his quest to achieve this, he came across the Bakshirs who were portrayed as simple-minded people who would give away any area of land one can afford at a very cheap price, but with a condition attached. He had to make a prepayment of let’s say 50cedis then walk through a stretch of land. He could walk for as far as he could, get back to the start point before sunset and all the lands he covered will be leased to him at the amount he prepaid.

Pahom started the journey full of energy and excitement. After walking for quite an appreciable distance, greed kept him going till he had to actually race his way back to the start point as sunset was approaching. He got so exhausted that he dropped dead when he got to the start point. The Bakshirs picked him up, dug a 6-feet pit and buried him there. So in essence, the size of land Pahom got was just 6-feet deep. What’s the point here? I have met a couple of ladies who have been complaining about their looks and physical appearance. It’s either the face is not beautiful enough, they don’t have enough hips, or they have a flat top. Others complain of thin lips… Huh

I’ve just been wondering how much of all of these body parts do we actually need as ladies? Are there universal dimensions we should all fit into? Well, I’m not discrediting the fact that our shape and stature as women adds to our beauty. It actually feels good standing in the mirror knowing everything is on point. Notwithstanding worrying unnecessarily about physical appearance, and how to attract enough attention can actually wear us out yet in the end beauty fades.

Charm is deceptive, and beauty does not last; but a woman who fears the Lord will be greatly praised.
Proverbs 31:30 NLT

Is there a universal standard for beauty? What is the prescribed hip size? What is the prescribed bust size? Who actually sets those standards? How thin should your nose be? How heavy should you weigh? Keeping a healthy weight is good for one’s health but not all of us have the model-kind of body. Often, anxiety sets in when we see perfection in others and keep our eyes closed to our side of beauty.

David saved himself the stress, and He said, “I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.” Psalms 139:14. My sister, there is the beauty that emanates from within- that is the Sweet Spirit. The world gives us a certain standard of beauty, but it is a woman who fears the Lord who will be greatly praised because she owns something which the Lord cherishes.

Don’t be concerned about the outward beauty of fancy hairstyles, expensive jewelry, or beautiful clothes. You should clothe yourselves instead with the beauty that comes from within, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious to God. 1 Peter 3:3‭-‬4 NLT

Cultivate the confidence that comes by walking with the Lord. Don’t stress, how much land did Pahom need? Only 6 feet. How much of these body parts do you need? Take care of the needful, which is to fear the Lord and everything else will fall in place. There is beauty in the fear of the Lord. Be grateful and praise God because you are fearfully and wonderfully designed. You are the woman made by God Himself for His Glory.

The Woman As Made by God

These are three things I believe every woman should know. Almost every woman at a stage in life have felt unworthy, probably because of how society has treated her or how her past keeps haunting her. Also the psychological and emotional rise and fall due to fluctuations in hormone levels has its own issues nevertheless women are most precious beings together with the men that exist on the surface of the earth.

Having the knowledge about how and why God made us as who we are is one sure way to excel as a woman. We were not made to compete with men but to cooperate with them to jointly achieve God’s aim of subduing the earth.

• The woman was made in the image of God.

When the idea of creating man came up, two beings were set into action. The male-man and the female-man. The nature of God in man is also found in the female. Creativity, sense of judgement, autonomy in making decisions and the desire for companionship are all attributes of God found in the female man as well. Understanding this will make us appreciate God and also live out our full potential because God Himself dwells in us.

The woman born and bred in the Lord shows forth the beauty of the Lord

• The woman was made purposefully.

The woman was not made as an after thought. She has always been part of the plan from the onset. Someone may say that the woman was made after God realised Adam could not find a suitable partner among the other creatures. Well,I will argue from the point that God wanted Adam to feel the need of a helper and a companion. You know that sometimes if you don’t feel the need for something, it’s difficult appreciating it. The woman was taken out of the man, from his side. A man and a woman are companions.

The woman who finds her purpose in life functions to her utmost capacity

• The woman was made for God first before the man.

The first person Eve saw when she was made was not the man. It was God, Himself. Also the only person Adam knew before Eve came was God. God provided man with the best relationship; the relationship with God. Focusing on your relationship with God as a woman is the best we can have as women. There are so many things in life we may want to attain as women- to marry, to have kids, to be successful in our careers but all of these things will be meaningful when our eyes are fixed on God.

The woman who grooms her being in the secret chamber of the Lord comes out more beautiful and prepared to face the issues of life.

A woman who comes to this place of understanding will always overcome the battle of inferiority complex. A being purposefully moulded by God and for Himself to fit into the Grand design of God to take the world for Himself.

My Praise, His home

Life will always not give you what you want. Many a time life takes us through journeys that makes us frustrated, worried, angry and upset. In these times it is easier for us to lose our praise.These moments are mostly very difficult times.

We tend to focus on the problems, frustrations and worries. The devil steals our praise by distracting us with other “worthless” things. The psalmist says, “But You are holy, Enthroned in the praises of Israel.”(Psalms 22:3 NKJV).

Our God is enthroned in our praise. One way to always have God around you is to praise Him. Whenever we praise the Lord even in times of trouble and anxiety, He joins us in the fire just as He joined the three Hebrew boys- Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego (Daniel 3).
It is comforting to know that He is with us all along the way. David, the man after God’s own heart said that, “even though I walk though the valley of the shadows of death. I Will fear no evil for you are with me” (Psalm 23:4).

The Lord is always with us. We have to make this our song to give us more reasons to praise.
One way to cultivate the presence of God is to praise. Let’s fill our homes with the presence of God. As we board the car to work, as we go through the day, we ought to be sure that our God is present.

We know the omnipresent nature of God makes Him to be everywhere at every time. Nevertheless, to get the manifest presence of God is consciously cultivated. Praise is the manure needed to cultivate the presence of God because the Bible says so.

The Lord inhabits the praise of His people. The slightest praise from us is enough to announce to the whole world that indeed our Lord is King. In order to get you off praising the Lord, the devil creates a mess.
The mess can be in the form of financial challenges, sicknesses, lawsuits and many more.
The mess the devil creates is just to keep our eyes away from our King. It is to cause us to be distracted. It is to cause us to lose our praise but we arise today as men and women of praise. We are making our home His home through praise.
We praise in the good times and bad, we praise through the tears because weeping endures for the night but joy comes in the morning. We smile, we jump, we praise because God’s got us.

Godly Romance; The Search for Intimacy- Part 1

Let me start with this, “You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you,
(Matthew 5:43‭-‬44 NIV). I know this is not the first time you are hearing this😀. This ain’t romantic at all but our Lord admonishes us to do so. So my first point is LOVE IS NOT A FEELING❌. You can’t tell me loving your enemy comes with do much of a feeling of affection and care. Love is a decision✔️.

Most of us at one point in time have had the thrills and joy that comes with being in love and we seek to express it in various ways. One Wiseman said, “there is always a right way of doing things, find it”. Let’s apply this here to our love lives, don’t express love based on your feelings❌

Feelings are based on physiological processes and they fail. Building stronger levels of lasting intimacy cannot be left at the mercy of physiological process. You cannot trade a lifelong relationship for a short period of hormonal surges. These triggers are really powerful yet lasts for a short time in fact, for a relationship with marriage in focus the lifespan of these surges is negligible as compared to a lifetime commitment.

The excitement, the thrills and the joy of excitement that we seek to express is what is referred to as Romance. Love is not Romance yet Romance expressed in the right way as a believer can enrich one’s relationship. Romance expressed only at the physical level is superficial. Deeper and richer intimacy is achieved when romance is all way round- physical, soul level and spiritual. For young people in relationships, there are restrictions as to how well you can express romance physically but there are exciting ways of showing care and love physically.

God is not unwise to tell us not to be unequally yoked with unbelievers. A strong foundation of commitment to each other as believers is a sure way to a successful relationship. A successful relationship is not one that only ends in marriage but one that glorifies God and builds up the people involved .

Any union that do not build its foundation on the spiritual is mostly bound to fail. The people of the world even know this. It is the reason why they get involved in blood covenants- The invitation of a third party, often a higher spirit, into the relationship to forever bind the union. Believers have the Greatest Being to invite into our relationships (dating or courtship). True romance starts when a man and a woman fully devoted and committed to God and to each other make Christ the Lord of their love life. Get things right at the spiritual level; pray together, worship together, study the Bible together and engage in activities that spiritually enhance your partner.

Do you want to enjoy a lifelong romantic and exciting relationship? Look no further, God is right here to help💡

Godly Romance: The Search for Intimacy Series

No kissing❌No sex❌No hugging❌ Don’t hold hands❌ Everybody is telling us what not to do yet no one tells us what to do. What should we do? This is a question that young people pursuing love relationships do not get answers to.

We often hear that the dating/courtship period (whichever you will call it, I am referring to the time a man and a woman agree to pursue a relationship with marriage in view) is the time to plan towards the future, check compatibility, pray into the future and gather resources towards a successful marriage.

Well, these are very important but it’s an aspect of the whole process. Man wants intimacy, we all want to feel accepted and needed. As a result of this most young people find their own means of getting intimate but we always ought to thank God because He has put everything in place to ensure that we are well built to enjoy deep intimacy and to marry for life🎉.

HE BROUGHT SOMETHING CALLED ROMANCE❤.

We’ve really not been told much about romance as Christians yet a whole book has been dedicated to romance in the Bible- Songs of Solomon. The world has done a “great job” by telling us what romance is as depicted in our movies, novels and other forms of media.
Hmmm and I remember Paul telling me not to be conformed to the standards of this world but definitions of romance are being thrown at me from all angles. What is romance? How does God view romance? Is romance necessary at all? Do I need to be romantic? Is God romantic?

Join me as we tackle the issue of romance in the Search for intimacy series. All I seek to do is to suggest the right way to you through the Word and by the Word. You deserve a wholesome spirit filled love life😁